what is this thing called “cognitive loss”?

I can only speak for myself but here is what it means to me.  I tease and say that I call it CRS…can’t remember stuff (insert your own word there) Anyone who hears me say this agrees that we all have a bit of it. 

To me it means on any given day if I have met you just a few times I may not remember your name.  I may not remember something you told me.  It means that I keep ALOT of lists and 3 calendars going at once all of varying sizes.  It means that if you ask me whether I am available to do something with you I will get a bit of a blank or panicked look on my face because I honestly can’t remember my schedule at just a moments notice.  I have to think about it. 

CRS also means that I can’t teach an hour long yoga class without notes.  It is frustrating? Yes! Embarassing? You bet! I just issue a standard disclaimer when I start a new class that I will always have notes to teach from.  We all kinda giggle and everyone says they have the same affliction. 

Whether they do or not, it’s a tough thing to live with, or without, depending on how you look at it. 

I also comment frequently that if this is what M.S. has given me then I’ll take it!  I can walk, talk, sleep, bend, twist, sit cross-legged, drive and live a pretty normal life.  Not everyone who lives with M.S. can do those things. Am I lucky? You don’t get M.S. because you are lucky.  Could it be worse?  Well of course….that’s true for all of us!  Gotta tell you, if you were to say I was lucky, I’d get a confused look on my face.  No one knows what M.S. is except those of us that live with it and it’s different for everyone!! 

So if someone you know has M.S., ask them about it.  Listen, let them tell you what it’s like.  We are all different and it’s a hard disease to understand. 

I write these last couple of paragraphs for friends that also live with M.S. and some of my closest friends who take the time to talk to me and ask ME how I am.  Thanks to all of you. 

Today’s Gatha:

Intention allows sysnapses to connect and many hundreds and thousands of movements are carried out by my body each day.  I appreciate the beauty of this system and what it allows me to do and experience.




1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Leslie Basinger
    Aug 20, 2013 @ 20:54:33

    I live it too. What time is my class? Where is it? Oh wait that’s tomorrow, but what time is it today? What day is it again? Thanks Sarah for the sharing and support and showing me that I can still move in my body in a way I never knew.


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